As you read this, chances are there is a person sitting next to you that wants to die. They may not have plans to take their own life but they probably wish someone else would. You may have had those thoughts yourself. I did. I used to wish for a semi-trailer to crash into my car or that slick roads would cause me to drive off the bridge. This may disturb some of you as you read this but I want you to know that these thoughts are very common. I remember reading a study years ago that said more than 50% of college students reported having suicidal thoughts.
As I have opened up about my story, I quickly learned that I was not alone in my suffering all those years. People you may think have it all, actually think the same thoughts I did and unfortunately too many people can’t find a way out and taking their own life is their only relief. Today is World Suicide Prevention Day. And instead of rattling off alarming statistics, this is my attempt to prevent suicide. This is my attempt to motivate you and give you the will to live. This is what helped me. You must first understand the story. I will tell it to you in 7 pictures and end it with a 1 minute video.
That is all you need to stay focused for…7 pictures and a 1 minute video.
On December 10, 2010, more than 300 people showed up in a record-breaking snowstorm in Green Bay, WI to wish my Dad well on his retirement as one of the most respected surgeons in Northeast Wisconsin.
Not even three months after his retirement, he was diagnosed with Stage IV pancreatic cancer. He had no symptoms and the tumor was inoperable. They gave him months to live. After he was diagnosed, he said to me, “Kerry, it is okay. I have no regrets. I have lived a great life.”
Five days later he took his entire family to Mexico. He said, “This tumor isn’t going anywhere but we are!”
He returned from his trip and started the fight. He endured months of chemotherapy, radiation, and alternative interventions all while playing with his family, scuba diving, sailing, and downhill skiing. He lost his hair and made goofy faces.
In February 2012, almost a year after his diagnosis he was informed the cancer had spread.
When he got the results, he looked at us and said, “Want to go to the water park?”
A month later the family got to enjoy another trip to Mexico where my Dad went scuba diving with us everyday. The day after we arrived home from our trip, he suffered a stroke. He couldn’t talk or move his right arm.
In this picture, my dad is at the hospital reading his medical charts and seeing that his organs were starting to shut down.
As a physician he knew what was happening to him. So he calculated how much time he had and then he started to WORK. For four days in the hospital he worked and worked and worked so he could carry out what he wanted to before he died.
He strengthened his hand so he could write to us. He learned to talk again so he could say his last words to us. He practiced walking up and down stairs so his wife and children didn’t have to help him at home, he practiced his vocabulary with preschool flashcards so he could play with his grandkids , and most importantly he still smiled.
After those 4 days we brought him home and he passed away peacefully with us by his side six days later.
I’ll bet the best surgeon in the world was proud of you!
I was blessed to have the opportunity of working with this fine physician in the hospital, the joy of seeing his handsome face (all the nurses thought he was a hunk), and once, the safety of his care. This is a befitting memorial of your dad, Kelly, and astounding way to enable him to continue his life of service. God bless you and your whole family. Mary Lou Case, Scottsdale, AZ
Hi Kerry – wow – I have tears in my eyes as I read your loving tribute to your Dad – what a beautiful memorial and one that I shall spread around to all I feel it may help. I loved your dad and this just brought back so many cherished memories of special times diving with him In Papua New Guinea, Tahiti, Indonesia, Cocos and Malpelo, He was a special part of the Mixed Nuts and sorely missed. It was Mike Marshall who forwarded this and I know they all feel the same. What a guy – all the way to the line. Thanks for making my day. Dom
Thank you Mary Lou for taking the time to share. It means the world. I absolutely love hearing how he touched people. He did have a pretty awesome face, didn’t he? I appreciate your support and service. I am so glad you got to work with him, I wish the world could have known him. God bless you!
This is an excellent – and very honest – post, Kerry! ~ Thank you for your courage to stand up and speak out for TRUTH — your truth and the truth of so many people living in our world today. ~ Depression has long been a taboo subject, leading many into a dark and deep silence that results in a life that feels confusing, disconnected and painful. And far too often, this life leads to suicide.
Because of your willingness to be vulnerable and to live truthfully from your heart and soul, I know you are changing lives. ~ And even better than that, you are SAVING lives!
Keep blazing this trail, Kerry – and keep shining your light!
You are a miracle worker – and the world needs more miracle workers.
May your ripple reach far and wide!
With much love and light –
Tina Games, http://www.JournalingByTheMoonlight.com