Be confident. Stand Tall. Love Yourself. Be Positive.
Yeah it all sounds great doesn’t? Finding lost confidence is way easier said, than done. When I was depressed, people would say to me, “You just have to think positive”, “Be happy”, “You have so much to be happy about”, “Just be confident, Kerry”, or “Be Yourself”. I wanted to scream at them! I wanted to say, “Really? Do you think I want to feel this way? If it were that easy, don’t you think I would be doing that!?”
There are many things you can do to build your self-confidence. You can stand taller and work on posture. You can give yourself loving messages. You can nourish your body, move your body, and put yourself to sleep. You can stand up for yourself, challenge yourself, and think positive. All of these things will help. However, if you want to make things much easier then you absolutely must do something first.
You must identify what robbed you of your confidence to begin with and take it back.
This is essential. Until you understand where and how you lost your confidence, you will never be able to move forward without struggle.
We were all born confident and positive. We didn’t have negative body image. We weren’t afraid to go after what we wanted. We didn’t slouch and hide. We learned all this.
Society and media messages have taught us to judge ourselves and our bodies. Comments about my soccer thighs and love handles led me to wear baggy clothes and I avoided all events that required swimsuits. Headlines telling me to “Lose my wrinkles and cellulite” and to “Drop pant sizes” led to Botox treatments and years of dieting, restricting, and bulimia.
Not making the team, getting laughed at in school, getting bullied, not getting the job, etc. These events gradually rob us of our joy. We gradually learn to be afraid. We are afraid to get up in front of people, afraid to try out, afraid to speak up, afraid to use our gifts, etc.
All these things are essential pieces of the confidence puzzle. You can’t put it back together without first examining these pieces so you understand how it works. Each of these pieces is part of your story. You were complete and whole when you came into the world and these pieces represent events that broke you away from that.
You need to heal these moments and challenge the negative thoughts that came along with them so you finally CAN stand tall, proud, and confident.
If you are struggling to examine the points in your past that led you to lose confidence, fear not, my signature methods are designed to aid this process. Here is a free homework snippet from my class that can help you to identify the source of your fears and how they hold you back from being truly confident. Give it a go, go find your confidence!
My Transformation 101 class is the ideal starting point for anyone wanting to heal their past pains and move forward into a confident, self-aware and authentic soul, learn more about it right here 🙂
Here is a clip with more confidence tips from “Coaching with Kerry” on Local 5 Live with Lisa Malak and Justin Steinbreck
Here is a segment from WSBT’s “Coaching with Kerry” with Jennifer Copeland