So a friend calls you for advice. You talk extensively, you listen, and provide great counsel. The conversation ends with your friend feeling much better but you feeling worse. What’s that all about?! This probably happens in your family too. Everyone calls you for help and you hold everyone together. Chances are after a while you are exhausted and feel like everyone is taking you for granted. Well…here is a new way of looking at it – you are the one taking you for granted.

If you find yourself feeling stuck in life or lacking fulfillment, be aware of times when you feel like you are being taken advantage of. Pay attention to times when you feel like the people around you aren’t appreciating what you are doing. Pay attention to what your friends and family ask you for. Are they asking for advice? Are they asking to spend time with you? Are they asking for help around the house? Are they asking you to take care of their kids or pets?

Pay attention to these things because these are your innate gifts. These are things that you were born with and you aren’t using in your life.  It is difficult for you to see these as gifts because they are part of you and you have always had them. Friends may call you all the time because YOU are a good listener and have good advice. You may be a good problem-solver or good with your hands, so they want YOU to help them fix their plumbing issue.  You may be nurturing and fun so they want YOU to watch their kids. You may be good at organizing, so they want YOU to plan this weekend’s party or event.

The feeling of success and fulfillment comes when we are using these natural gifts of ours and being recognized for them. I will never forget the first testimonial I received from a client, the first payment, and the first hug. We will never be valued by others until we recognize our own value.

So next time you feel unappreciated by your family and friends, stop and ask yourself if you are appreciating yourself.